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Monstrous On Main



Regular price $12.00 USD
Regular price Sale price $12.00 USD
Sale Sold out
Shipping calculated at checkout.

Text reads "HONK IF YOU'D RATHER BE a carefree little woodland creature in the forest, like perhaps a bounding doe or one of those squirrels with tufts on the ends of their ears, frolicking freely through flowering fields with all of your other little woodland friends. No housing crisis, no student loan debt payments, no unaffordable healthcare plans, no "grindset" culture, no social media algorithms, no ads wherever you look; just you, your friends, the warm sun on your backs, the lush green grass beneath your little animal feet, the scudding white clouds making whimsical shapes in the sky, & the breeze filling your nose with the smell of honeysuckle"

Inspired by true events! And by true events, I mean what I would rather be doing instead of driving. And yes, it is part of the joke that the font is intentionally very tiny, with way too much text for someone who's tailgating you to possibly read.

All bumper stickers are 3x10" and made to withstand all kinds of weather. They will not fade, flake, or disintegrate. Remember when attaching the sticker to start in the center and press outwards to push out any air bubbles.


Printed on weather-resistant vinyl

Processing & Shipping

Orders can take up to 2 weeks to process. Transit times average 3-4 days domestic and 4-6 weeks international. Please make a note in your order or contact me with your order number if you need your item(s) to arrive by a certain time.

Items are shipped either in a 10"x7" purple parcel or a 12"x3"x3" white cardboard box. International shipping labels display item descriptions, domestic labels do not. Please make a note in your order or contact me with your order number if you require discreet shipping.


3 x 10 inches (7.5 x 25.5 cm)

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    Free shipping on domestic orders $35 and over! Does not apply to international packages.


    Returns and exchanges are not accepted except in specific circumstances. Please contact me if you have any problems with your order.

    I DO NOT replace items lost or damaged in transit. All packages over $50 are insured; if your item gets lost in transit, please contact me and be patient while your claim processes.